Now, of course there will always be exceptions, but generally successful people are happy, positive people. The question is: are they happy because they are successful, or are they successful because their positive attitude helped propel them towards success?
Answers may vary, but more likely, the successful people were able to get where they are now because they were, positive, confident, and did what needed to be done. Their "never say can't" attitude stemmed from within.
Feeling good about yourself can create an environment where events and life scenarios around you are easily experienced as positive. Even those that would otherwise seem negative. For example, the loss of a job may allow you to evaluate career paths. A person who loves themselves (and let us not confuse loving oneself with conceit), will have more self-confidence in this circumstance. This confidence can allow for energy and self-encouragement when looking for a new job, and perhaps in a new direction, in such a way that might actually improve their life! The late David Brinkley, former NBC and ABC newscaster, said it right, "A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him or her."
Loving yourself, even when challenges come your way will help you be happier with yourself, which in turn will help you be happier with your life, which in turn will help you think positively about goals and life events, and allow you to never say can't.
Reach for the Sky.
A person of integrity should never have to lie about anything. While certain statements, ideas, or actions may not have the approval of others, as long as honesty is the first priority, integrity is at work. If someone feels that they have to lie about something, then there was something wrong with that initial act. However, everyone makes mistakes, and apologizing after the fact can also demonstrate integrity. Hiding, or denying a wrongdoing leads to greater consequences down the road. One lie leads to another and so on and so on.
Recently, a "friend" of mine came to discuss one of hey wrongdoings. She admintted to an act of infedelity. At the time, the unfaithful act "felt" right in the heat of the moment, and this was the defense she used to validate her behavior. The need to confess to someone and make excuses led me to believe that she felt internally guilty. She further defended herself by assuming that if her partner didn't find out, no harm was done. My friend was only lieing to herself. The necessity to find a rationale for her actions only firther supported my suggestion to confess to the person she was hurting by engaging in her wrongdoing. Withholding information is not the same as lieing per se, but can have similar consequences. I advised this friend to come clean with her partner. Harboring her guilt could just lead to further complications in the relationship. Being honest with herself and honest with her partner would demonstrate integrity as a person by admitting to a mistake. While integrity can take on differnt meanings, I believe a person's integrity does not mean their perfection, but rather, their effort to "do the right thing". Granted, nothing could be said further or admitted to her partner, and everything could work out fine, but is it worth the risk of having the truth come out later? This is certainly no easy feat to admit to her actions, so much so that the words, "I can't" quickly spewed from her mouth when I shared my thoughts on the steps she should now take..
In this situation, there were no "can't" options. I told her, "you CAN keep quiet and fester with guilt", or "you CAN admit to your wrongdoing and face up to the consequences". There was no can't scenario. She ultimately decided she CAN find alternatives and sought mediation counseling to discuss the issue with her partner.
Never saying can't when it comes to personal endeavors may be easier than making the effort to push forward and say CAN when your actions involve another person.
Have you or someone you know been in a situation where it seemed easier to say "Can't" because you did not want to face up to a mistake? I'd love to hear how you overcame a can't attitude and dealt with the issue.
Commuter busing becomes more popular as workers have to travel further for their jobs, as an effort to save gas, and to help the environment by having less vehicles on the road. I would image each person has their own reason for using commuter transportation. I choose to take a bus for a variety of reasons and I appreciate that this option is available to everyone. On my way in to work today, a call came in over the radio to our driver reporting that some riders had to be left behind at a stop because there just was not enough room. How unfortunate! The compassionate bus driver, knowing he was going to pass by that stop, offered to pick up the remaining passengers. Selfishly, a passenger in the front row of my bus exclaimed, "We can't! That is not on our scheduled route! We are not supposed to waste time stopping there!" I couldn't believe what I heard. The driver merely ignored her distressed complaints, as he rightly should have. The stop was literally on the road we were traveling on and did not take much time at all. The abandoned people were also extremely grateful. However, even if the bus took 10 full minutes out of the way, I would not have minded. It is unfortunate that the lady on the bus could not see past her own "inconvenience" of a few minutes, in order to realize that the people we were picking up were more severly inconvenienced. If we had not stopped, they would have stood there waiting for another 45 minutes!
Sometimes we need to just get over ourselves and see the bigger picture. Then, take joy in the fact that there are kind people, like our bus driver, who don't mind going a little out of their way to help someone out. The lady on the bus used that awful word "can't". Yet, the driver DID stop and everything worked out just fine. So why did she think we couldn't? In this instance, perhaps fear of being late? Who knows. The message: Put yourself in someone elses shoes, get over yourself, and see the bigger picture!
I like to garden. I have spent the past few weeks tending to my little plants - watering, pruning, etc. Taking the time out to do somthing you enjoy can have such a positive impact on your life. Specifically, when I garden, watching my plants grow allows for opportunity to reflect also on how I grow each year spiritually, intellectually, and devlopmentally. Despite all the downpours I have had in my area, and several days of flash heat waves, these little plants are pushing up towards the sky. These plants are another way to keep me encouraged and positive. Even if I have a "rainy day," I will continue to grow, and continue to reach for the sky.
Find something that you enjoy that can be symbolic of what you hope to achieve in your own personal development. The physical tending to this hobby, task, or craft will help you to emotionally and psychologically push forward in your own endeavors and never say can't.
Today, being a Friday, was a positive day from the beginning because the weekend was upon me. In the evening I was walking past a small meadow a few blocks from my house, when a sensation of delight overwhelmed my body as I saw the flicker of yellow lights dancing around in the twilight. Fireflies! Yup, it's that time of year already. Seeing fireflies has always brought a smile to my face every year as far back as I can remember. Today, the happiness comes from remembering summertime and school breaks, barbeques and pool parties, youthfulness and freedom. Seeing those little glowing dots come back year after year allows me to be positive. Even through the hard times in my life, facing obstacles, moments like today are one of the ways I motivate myself to push forward and Never Say Can't.
From time to time, it becomes difficult to keep pushing forward, or keep a positive attitude. Plastering a smile on my face takes a lot of effort. In the end, however, I get over that slump, and am extrememly grateful that I didn't give up. I know I CAN do what I set my mind to. Even if I procrastinate for a little while :)